Father’s Day 2019: The Top Gifts People Give (And What You Should Give Instead)

Following in the newly started tradition of our recent Mother’s Day post, we thought we would bring you more of our sage wisdom for Father’s Day.

With that said, we scoured the internet for a few minutes again and found an article that shows the most common gifts people plan to buy for their dads this Father’s Day.

Once again, we read it, digested it, and then went a completely different direction.

1. Instead of a Greeting Card (62%), Mow A Sincere Message In The Yard

Cards are the number one gift for both moms and dads. It makes sense. They’re an easy way to tell your Dad “thank you” for all the time he’s spent keeping you on a somewhat stable path in your life.

But cards are easy. What you want is to put some thought into it. After all, most people agree the uniqueness of a gift is what’s most important.

So, step up your uniqueness factor and write Dad a heartfelt message—then mow it in his front lawn. Print it in large, block letters. Or use cursive. Add flares to accentuate it. Either way, make sure it stands out.

Besides, his yard probably needs mowing anyway, and he’ll thank you for taking care of that at the same time.

Option B: If Dad doesn’t have a front yard—or any yard—then buy him a yard and do it anyway.

2. Instead of a Special Outing (47%), Take Dad On A Bare Bones Survival Excursion

Restaurants are nice. You know what else is nice? Recapturing that inner sense of adventure by taking Dad into the wilderness via a blind parachute drop with nothing but the clothes on your back.

Dad just wants to spend time with you and, while a meal is a nice way to catch up and talk, so is the amount of bonding you’ll do while figuring out a way to make it back to civilization without being mauled by a couple of bears or starving to death.

Dad will thank you when you eventually make it out and he’s reminded of the vigor of his youth from the adrenaline rush that will probably take three days to wear off. That, and he’ll be glad you went the extra mile for some quality bonding time.

Option B: Take him to Ikea.

3. Instead of Gift Card (43%), Get The Same Amount in Pennies, Nickels, and Dimes, and Hide Them In The Couch

Look, gift cards are nice and all as long as you get the kind that can be spent anywhere and not just at one place.

But dads also love nostalgia as much as moms do. And what better way to remind Dad of all the times he had to scrape together enough money to keep your stomach full than by giving him some cold hard cash in the form of loose change littered inside the couch?

Don’t just sprinkle them in the easy places to reach either. Make sure the slip between the gaps and cover a good portion of the floor. If you have any type of reclining section, try to work the coins into the springs and locking mechanisms. You know, for fun.

Option B: Only use pennies, but mix in jelly beans, screws, and cashews.

4. Instead of Electronics (20%), Buy A 1,000-Count Pack of Ear Plugs

You know what Dad wants? Silence. Completely utter and blissful silence. But he probably won’t get that from you any time soon. Nor will he find it anywhere else.

Sure, there are noise canceling headphones that might do the trick better, but their batteries will eventually die, and then your dad won’t be able to find any in the drawer, and then he’ll tear the house apart, and, instead of going to the store, it will become this big ordeal and…

Look, just buy the earplugs. They’re cheap. They’re always around. And he can use them all year round without anyone asking him what he’s listening to.

Option B: Buy him a cabin in the woods far removed from civilization.

5. Instead of a Tool or Appliance (18%), Give Him A Broken Chair

At first glance, you might be wondering, “Who wants a broken chair?” The answer: Dad.

You might think your dad just wants some time to relax this Sunday. And you couldn’t be more wrong. Dads like fixing things and solving problems—even when everything’s fine and nothing actually needs fixing.

Fixing a chair will remind your dad how much he’s needed and still somewhat useful to have around. Plus, whenever company comes over and someone uses the chair, it will give him the opportunity to tell a 37-minute-long story about every step he took to fix it.

So, it really is a gift that keeps on giving.

Option B: Break the couch as you hide the change in it.